Archive for the ‘Game’ Category
Game
The do’s and don’ts of dating a K-Stater:
1. No hanky panky during the game.
I don’t care if it’s an away game. More than likely you had your shot earlier in the day. I’m going to need a full glass of Bacardi and room to jump around frantically in the case of a Collin Klein Touchdown.
2. Don’t make plans for Valentine’s day.
Why, you may ask? K-State might be playing KU in the OOD (Octagon of Doom). What better way of showing my affection than screaming my lungs out in front of 12, 528 of my dearest friends? Suck it up and pretend to like it.
3. Don’t make me meet your Dad at a K-State football game.
What a horrible idea. Guess what? It’s the last game of the year vs. Iowa State. It’s not my job to entertain your dad, in an attempt to force him to fancy me. I’ve got a date with my red solo cup, Jim Beam, and the Chamber (Collin Klein) here in 3 hours. I need to stay focused.
4. Do compliment the dude wearing the natty light cowboy hat at the tailgate.
Listen, we both know he’s an idiot, he can’t help it. Give the guy a break.
5. Don’t walk in front of the washer boards.
My boys Dereck and Dave will cut you for less. This is a major party foul. Save yourself one of your nine lives.
6. Don’t be better than the Wabash.
You know you think it’s cool and you want to join. Start rocking or start walking. You make the call. I’ll scream “next!” faster than, well, someone who screams “next!” a lot.
7. Do compliment me on how pretty I look in Purple.
I don’t care if I’m a dude, I like to hear how nice I look, and how badass my Willie shirt is. In fact, while you’re at it, compliment my friends too.
8. Do enjoy Aggieville.I don’t care what school you went to. There’s nothing like this at your school, unless you’re Texas. I mean we’re in a small town in Kansas, yet sometimes I feel like I’m walking down Bourbon Street. Be impressed, DAMMIT!
9. Do ignore it if a bunch of girls say “hi” to me at the game.I was at K-State for 5 years, so… yeah. If you do the math, the chances are fairly high. Let your mind run wild—I’m Fanning, after all.